Privacy, women, children: The bullshit behind North Carolina’s bathroom bill

Let’s start with the assumption that you are a logical person and statistics and facts have meaning to you. From this point let’s talk about North Carolina’s bathroom bill. The bill says, ‘(Public agencies, local boards of education) shall require every multiple occupancy bathroom or changing facility to be designated for and only used by persons based on their biological sex.’ It says that the agencies or boards of education can make separate facilities available for special circumstances. Hold on. This sounds familiar. Oh yeah, Jim Crow Laws, which were also intended to protect the safety of women and children by providing separate facilities. Turns out that was racist as hell, huh? So, let’s break this down. The argument for the North Carolina bathroom bill is that it protects privacy and it protects women and children from potential predators.

First, privacy. This law is suggesting that we police the bathrooms. Correct? Am I reading that right? That single-sex multiple occupancy bathrooms should be used according the sex listed on your birth certificate. A law that is protecting my privacy is asking me to have a rather personal piece of evidence on my person at all times in case someone needs to confirm my birth gender. Oh yeah, my privacy feels completely protected. The moment I make the painful decision to poop in a public restroom I crave some sense of privacy. The hand dryer repeatedly running muffling my poop noises. Or better yet, a completely empty bathroom! You know what doesn’t feel private in that moment, coming out of the stall being asked to show my birth certificate.

Second, the safety of women. ………..
I needed a minute because this justification is truly insane. Gov. McCrory, I’m SUPER surprised you didn’t start with North Carolina’s extremely narrow definition of rape. If I’m reading this right (correct me if I’m not) the definition of first-degree forcible and second-degree forcible rape both state the person must engage in vaginal intercourse with another person by force. Are you kidding me? So, as long as vaginal intercourse has not taken place then it wasn’t rape. This is ludicrous. This rape law excludes so many violations and assumes men are not rape victims. Oh and the attacker has to either use a weapon, have another person with them or injure the rape victim. WTF. Also, I have to point out North Carolina was one of the last states to eliminate the marital rape exemptions.

If we want to protect women, let’s start with rape laws, not a bathroom bill. We’ve heard the stats: only 2% of rapist spend a day jail, 68% of assaults are not reported, 1 out of 6 women have been a victim of rape or attempted rape. I’ve heard too many stories of rape and sexual violence. We live in a rape culture. Have women been attacked in a bathroom by men? I have no doubt. But what happens to those men afterwards if it’s reported? This isn’t about keeping the predators out of the bathroom because predators are everywhere. It’s about setting a precedent that rape is NOT okay. That sexual violence will be punished.

Third, the safety of children. Ted Cruz recently said that he supported NC bathroom bill because he wasn’t too excited about men going to the bathroom with his daughters. The pro-bathroom bills have painted this picture of a male predator gaining access to the bathroom to prey on little girls. Ok. Let’s step back here. First, yes, I’ll acknowledge after some research I discovered a handful of incidents of men dressing up as women to gain access to the women’s restroom. These men were not transgender. However, even with a bathroom bill in place, how does that stop this person from entering the bathroom? Logistically I don’t see how this bill prevents these people from entering the bathroom. The majority of predators aren’t going out purchasing women’s clothes, shaving, donning wigs and waiting, and waiting, and waiting for girls to enter the bathroom alone. That just isn’t the facts. Only 10% of child abusers are strangers to the child. Also, what about the boy victims? How do we determine what men going into the men’s restroom are in there to assault boys? We can’t.

Fear breeds hate. The bathroom bills and the bigot propaganda promoting the bills are meant to paint the trans person as a sexual deviant. I’ve heard people say, this isn’t about trans people, it’s about guys dressing up as women and keeping children safe. Well, clearly, it’s not. Look at the facts, there are much better ways to keep women and children safe from predators. The bathroom bill prevents nothing. It allows citizens the freedom to harass trans and gender-nonconforming people. It doesn’t provide safety for anyone at all. It takes away rights and promotes violence.

As a trans man I’ve used a lot of public restrooms without incidents. There were some bathrooms where I feared for my own safety but not those around me. I don’t tend to be the one with the upper hand in the bathroom. And now, Gov. McCrory, you have endangered my life. You have endangered many of your citizens’ lives as well. The blood of the trans population is on your hands.