Comment section wins presidential election

I’ve struggled with what to write since the election results. I thought the most useful thing would be determining the true devastation the Trump presidency might cause the LGBT community. However, that task has been started: What a Trump Administration Could Mean for LGBTQ Rights, and Here is what President Trump means for LGBT Rights. Instead, I’m going to use this space to explain why I was devastated when Trump won the election.

Spending six years in the newspaper business you see your fair share of nasty comments. The comment section is quite often viewed as pure trash. I worked at my hometown newspaper for four of the six years and I watched the ‘faggot’s and the ‘disgusting’s pour in whenever we’d run any kind of LGBT story. I’d be told, ‘Oh. Just ignore them. They are trolls.’ A few years later, I began to write a column and this blog. Again, the comment section would spew hate and disgust. Again, I would hear, ‘Don’t even read them!’

But I kept reading. I felt this sense this was America – at least a portion and uncensored. I had this intuition because I lived it. I knew that uneasy feeling of being a queer person in small town Indiana. These commenters weren’t lonely, angry people just trolling the internet. These cries of ‘homo’s and ‘once a bitch, always a bitch’s weren’t the fringe. These people were teachers, factory workers, professionals, white collar and blue collar. The comment section was full of hate because there are/were a large number of people full of hate.

They hated difference. They hated when someone made choices that disagreed with. They hated me.

On Tuesday night as the election results poured in, I had that same feeling I had reading the comment sections. Wow. America hates women, queer people, POC. Wow, America hates me. The only reassurance was seeing the popular vote remain on Hillary’s side.

I get there is an ebb and flow to the way we do politics in America. We try one brand and get bored and we swing toward the other one. Next time, it’ll be our turn. But what I’m struggling with most is seeing the actual numbers. America voted for the nastiest comments section I’ve seen – Donald Trump. Full of hate. Division. Anger. Let’s be honest – that’s all he is a bag full of comments. You can’t ignore this comments section. We can’t ignore the fact that 60,071,650 people liked the nastiest commenter. This isn’t about losing the election. It isn’t about the inability to further push equality (I mean it kinda is). It’s affirmation of our deepest fears – that we are that hated and unwanted in our own country.

But while our fears are affirmed so is our fight. We are ready to continue progress and we will. I personally will continue to work to build a bridge between us and them. I’ll continue to engage in conversations with those willing to learn. I will write my truths and live a life out loud. I won’t hide and I won’t run. I’m right here. I’m queer! Hear me roar. Ready to listen, ready to fight, ready to cry. And if you need someone to talk to – I am here. Remember, you are who you say you are.